Why I Love Hate Mail

I started getting hate mail as soon as I entered the ministry.  

At first it concerned me a lot because I desired to keep good relationships with everyone.  After a few years I realized that not only was it not possible to please everyone, but that some opposition would always be there.

What To Do With The Letters

I didn’t know what most people did with nasty letters, so early on in ministry I decided to keep them all in a file rather than throw them away.  This way I could review them, and pray through them so that the criticism would not demoralize me.

Surely there was some truth in some of the letters that I needed to hear (although this wasn’t the ideal way to hear it).  But, to say there was some truth in all of the letters, though it sounds spiritual, would not be true.  A large number of them were worthless in content and clearly written with evil intentions.  

What To Do With The Authors

Some are mild; some are severe; and they all sting.  Replying in writing is almost never the right response.  Pursuing the relationship to clear up misunderstandings is the right course of action, if it is possible.  Sometimes it works.

Romans 12:17–18 ESV “Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all. If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.”

It is a cowardly act by those who write vitriolic letters instead of just getting together in person to talk, listen and seek understanding with self-control.  But, it is not helpful to think too much on this, because there is often little that can be done with such types of people. 

What To Do With Yourself

Opposition and suffering are part of the calling.  Hate mail is a good reminder of this. Have a plan to deal with your hate mail so it doesn’t destroy you, make you bitter or handicap with your work for the Kingdom.  Figure out how to take advantage of these opportunities given to you.

By God’s grace through much prayer, we will come to understand our weaknesses more fully, and as a result grow into a better Christian and servant of the Gospel and the Church.  

More importantly, we will be amazed at how God strengthens us in each situation to keep pressing ahead; and how all the while He is making us even more useful for His future purposes.  

Eventually Throw Them Away

I held on to the letters for a number of years for three reasons:

• To pray for those controlled by anger and refusing healthy godly relationships;
• To remind myself how many people are full of fear and taken advantage of by the evil one to oppose to the Mission of God; and
• For sheer amusement in re-reading the ludicrous things people will put on paper!  

This is why I truly love hate mail!

Recently I threw away the file.  It served its purpose.  Now, I can read these types of letters more quickly, analyze them more easily, pray more clearly and laugh more appropriately. . . . And just for the record, I have received far more letters of encouragement over the years than criticism.